This paper explores the birth of a secret creative self within suppressive or silencing organizations, such as cults, by focusing on concrete instances in which members of such organizations challenge the organization’s leadership and norms. Building on Goffman’s concept of the backstage, it considers how cult members create both physical and mental backspaces to allow the birth of a secret creative self within the cult. Through the stories of former cult members, it sheds light on how the “occupied self,” as Goffman called it, can use these backspaces to preserve and restore a sense of personal autonomy.