ABSTRACT
The paper argues that the findings that the key ingredient of any successful form of psychotherapy is the therapeutic relationship needs to be theorised and subjected to research. There has been a danger that the therapeutic relationship can be dismissed as an intangible concept consisting of features such as being ‘nice’, ‘respectful’ and ‘pleasant’ with people, couples and families. Instead, the paper argues that it is one of the most important areas that requires the development of a strong theoretical basis and supporting research. It is argued that a strong candidate for a relevant and clinically applicable theory is attachment theory and its links with contemporary neuroscience. The paper discusses how attachment theory can provide a map for how to adapt the therapeutic relationship to provide a sense of safety in relation to individual differences and different family patterns.