ABSTRACT
With a contextual and developmental perspective, this study aimed to examine Swedish late-adult fathers’ reflections on their past and present parental role in relation to the mother and to see how these reflections incorporate changes in gender and parenthood during recent decades in Sweden. Twenty Swedish fathers of adult children, aged 61–77 years, participated in an interview concerning their parental identity. Answers concerning their reflections on their parental role over time and in relation to mothers were analyzed using thematic analysis. We formulated themes concerning their (1) self-positioning as a father in relation to the mother and gendered norms; (2) the fathers’ wishes to have done things differently while expressing that they had no regrets over the choices they had made as a parenting couple; (3) alleviating regret by relating to history-graded changes and societal and relational contexts; and (4) an experience of “growing together” as parenting partners, interpreted as the co-construction of a joint parental identity, expressed either as a conflict-free conversation climate around parenting being interpreted as agreement or as a joint understanding emerging through discussions about parenting issues. Analyses deepened the understanding of the traditional allocation of parental roles and how fathers, in light of their lifelong parenthood and current retrospective perspective, may wish they had done things differently, while simultaneously saying they had no regrets as their joint choices had made sense at the time and seeing the fact that the “kids are alright” as proof of their successful parenthood.