Engaging children and adolescents in ADHD care is critical for future independent disease management. However, there is a lack of evidence guiding health professionals and parents on how best to engage their children and adolescents in ADHD care. We recruited 41 diverse parents of children and adolescents with ADHD and 11 adolescents with ADHD from an urban, safety-net hospital to participate in in-depth, semi-structured qualitative interviews and then analyzed this data using thematic analysis. Children’s level of illness insight about ADHD and self-esteem emerged as two major contributors to engagement of children and adolescents in ADHD care, and their intersection created four styles of engagement: proactive (high insight, high self-esteem), anxious (high insight, low self-esteem), apathetic (low insight, high self-esteem), and resistant (low insight, low self-esteem). This framework can help health professionals engage children and adolescents in care for ADHD and guide development of interventions to improve engagement in care.